On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom. This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes. Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls’ eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn’t help doing so. I moved Dew’s hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I’ve got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.
However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew’s body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn’t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I’ve got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I’m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month’s time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn’t want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don’t tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn’t tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it’s time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn’t notice that our life lacked intimacy.I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won’t divorce. I’m serious.
She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of life, not because we didn’t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until we are old.
FIND
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Saturday, October 18, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Munting Library
I like reading..bata palang ako nun,nakakitaan na ako ng hilig pagbabasa. Matalino daw ako nung bata. At the age of 3 i can count hanggang 100 daw. At me Spanish version pa. matalino na yun nung mga panahong yon considering di pa uso promil nun..ala pa gaanong gifted child - at batang am ako, hahahah! syempre, di ko naman alam tong mga to - kwento na lng sakin to nung nagkaisip na ako.
3 Years old din daw I can write my name na.4 years old and I can read.And naaalala ko, i was 4 when Papa was in Saudi, and gumagawa ako ng love letters sa kanya non! O diba! Mama always ask me to write a portion sa mga letter na pinapadala nya kay Papa. I would remember na sa yellow paper pa kame sumusulat nun.
My mom was a fulltime housewife. Ang trabaho lang nya nun e ang mag-alaga ng 3 makukulet na bata -kame yun. 3 pa lng kame nung mga panahong yun. Di masasabing mayaman sina Mama during her child years. Pero can afford sila. Yung whitewesting house na ref na ammahal nung mga panahonh yon e meron sila. Paano kase, sa UP nagwo-work si Lolo at malakas ang tindahan ni Lola. Sari-sari store lang pero yun lang yata ung tindahan sa lugar namin. Plus makikita mo naman sa mga damit nila. pati na yung mga pictures sa studio. Grabe, every year yata meron! At sa mga Flores de Mayo - palaging sila ang Hermana Mayor!
So when I was 5 or 6, and being the eldest, katulong ako ni Mama maglinis ng bahay. As in tinataob namin ung bahay. Hanggang sa kasuluksulukang agiw e aalis, at kahit yung pinakamabigat na cabinet e ililipat para mapunasan ung ilalim. At merong part ng bahay na puro books, na sa sobrang kalumaan na e iniipis na, at kulay brown na yung mga pages. Yun yung mga unang books na nabasa ko. Encyclopedias - na kinukulayan pa namin nun (malay ba naman namin na mahal yon e luma na!), reader's digest ni Papa, meron pang mga magasins for Arnis, chessbook, literature books at napakadami pang iba. Noon, naalala ko na yung ung last part ng bahay na nililinis. At pag yun na, wla na, inaabot na ako ng mahigit 3 oras dun, kase lahat ng libro na mapagdiskitahan ko e binabasa ko. Kaya kameng 3, mahilig magbasa. Ako hanggang ngayon e enjoy pa din magbasa. Ewan ko lang yung 2.
Hinde ko na matandaan ano ung unang book na natapos ko basahin.basta ang alam ko, madami akong nabasa. At dun ko na-feel na masarap pala magbasa.Ang dami ko nalalaman.At ganun ang ginagawa ko every month na nag-general cleaning kame ng bahay. Yun din ang past time ko nung rumaraket si Mama sa palengke. Nagtitinda sya ng pansit bihon. Sarap magluto nun e. Agt nung mga times na nasa palengke si Mama, naiiwan kameng 3 sa bahay. And since wala kame kasama, at natatakot tong si Mama na baka kung san kame makaabot kakagala , she would lock the door. Yung bintana open, pero yung door naka-padlock. Para kameng preso, hahahah! Yung bintana pa namin nun e ung sinaunang binata, na pedeng-pedeng tumalon. And for that, nilagyan ni mama yun ng kawayan na ipinako na parang grills para hinde kame makaalis. So pag ganun, nagbabasa ako ng books.Wala kase kameng TV nun e. Nasira na yung TV na napanalunan ni Mama at Papa sa raffle nung kakakasal lang nila (which reminds me, kame din ni Cotaco ganun ah! heheheh!)
Pero d kalaunan, dahil mautak tong kapatid kong si Sherdon, pinukpok na yung isang kawayan. natanggal naman sa pagkakapako pero ung pako nakadikit pa den sa kawayan lng. So para kameng mga presong nakalaya nun! Hahahah, laro d2, takbo dun. At alam namin pag pabalik na si Mama. Normally 1 oras sya sa palengke pag mamimili lang. So kame, lalabas ng kulungan 10 mins after umalis ni Mama (baka kase bumalik at me naiwan e), at babalik kame sa loob 10 mins bago sya dumating. At never nya kame nabuking! hahahahah!
Dun sa munting library namin ako unang nakabasa ng slumbook. I was around 8. Grade 3. kalaki-laking notebook pa nun yung ginamit nila. Hinde katulad ng mga slumbook ngayon na ang gaganda at ambabango. Yung nakita ko, mala-scrapbook ung dating.Pero halatang pinaganda lang ng ballpen at kung anu-anong art. Ung mga crush, love, motto,at kung anu-ano pa, na nung mga panahong yon e wala akong kamuwang-muwang, dun ko nalaman. At umiral ang pagiging chismosa ng lola. Noon, itinatago ni Mama yung mga sulat na galing kay papa sa kabinet lang. Hinde nga yta naka-lock yun nun. So hayun,nabasa ko mga kaek-ekan nila.Hahahahah!Dun ko nalaman na me time na halos 4 months na di nakakapagpadala ng pera si Papa sa min.Delayed din daw kase ung pasweldo ng employer. Nag iisip ako tuloy na magaling dumiskarte tong Nanay ko. 3 na kameng nag aaral nun, puro raket lang sya kaya nagkakaroon ng datung. Me nabasa pa ako ng halos 2 months bago nakasagot sa sulat si Papa.
Mahilig si Mama sa mga artista. Peborit nya si Manilyn Reynes. Kaya naman, sangkaterbang magazine (di ko na matandaan yung name, basta yung k Cristy Fermin yun) ang nakita ko kung san lahat e me article about Manilyn. O dibah? Kaya parang ako e naging peborit ko din si Mane. Nung nauso ang pocketbook, syempre, adik din ako nun. Nung una, puro tagalog lang binabasa ko. Minsan kinakaya ko na sa isang araw e sampu yta nababasa ko, yung mga tig 150+pages per book. Kaso nanawa ako, pare-pareho storya. YUng tipong magkainisan dati, maiinlab. O kaya magjowang me 3rd party. Wla nang thrill basahin.
So bumalik ako sa aming munting library. Me nakita akong isang English pocketbook, ang kapal nun, mga 500 plus pages. At natapos ko sya ng 2 araw lang, over the weekend (Note: me gawaing bahay pang kasama yan). It's a story of a girl named Jonie - who was a very lively, cheerful, pretty eventually became paralyzed, until she learned how to use her mouth the write and paint. So the story is on how she gave up and hate the world for what happend to her, but with the help of few people who strengtens her faith e natanggap nya eventually and she even tried to live happily kahit ganun yung nangyari sa kanya.
minsan nasermunan ako ni Papa (matindi magsermon yun, daig pa pari sabi ni Mama. 3 oras ng walang hinto). Bumalik na sya galing Saudi. nabanggit nya sakin na magbasa daw ako ng Bible para hindi daw matigas ulo ko. So since mabuting bata naman ako sa pagkakaalam ko, i did. As in inumpisahan ko sa Genesis.Although hindi ko naman nabasa lahat. Me part dun, Psalms yata, na hindi ko mainindihan kaya lipat ako sa New testament. kaso, yung books of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, pare-pareho. Sabi ko, ay bakit ganun? So lipat naman ako sa Revealations. So I would say na madami naman akong nabasa sa Bible. Hindi nga lang lahat - at hindi ko kabisado.
Grade 6 ako nung madyo naging pabibo ako. Feeling ko nga kase e matalino ako. Although honor student naman ako ng Grade 1. Grade 2 pang-7 ako sa top 10 kaso 5 lang binigyan ng medal. grade 3 - kasama sa top 10 sa Religion. Grade 4 at Grade 5, palaging kulang ng point para makasama sa honor roll. Palaging 5 kinukuha nun at either pang 6 or pang 7 ako. Grade 6 nung nagkaroon nga mga pambato para sa quiz bee..As usual, salimpusa na naman ako..umaatend ako ng mga coaching nila after classes..enjoy naman. Kase natututunan mo na yung mga lectures before pa i-discuss sa klase. Pero one-week before the quiz bee, nilipat ako sa essay writing. Maryosep, kelangan pala dun e magandang magsulat (as in hand writing), dedma na ung content.. Anyway, after nun, nagkaroon pa ng isa pang contest - QUIZ BEE..1 buwan yata before nun e palagi kameng me spelling exam to identify sino magiging representative ng school. Sa kagustuhan kong magkaroon man lng ng medal ng Graduation - binabasa ko ung webster's dictionary! take note - hinde pocket dictionary ha, yung makapal! Ending - hinde nagkaroon ng representative school namin, dunno why.
Pero sa awa naman ng Diyos, dininig nya dasal ko - Achiever's list ako nung graduation namin nung grade 6. Me medal ako, kaso hinde na pala umaakyat mga parents nun. hanggang sa nag High school na ako.3 taon nabakante si papa after nya mangaling ng Saudi. And after 3 years, saka pa lang sya nagkaroon ng work. Ipinasok sya ni Ninang na electrician sa Mapua High sa Doroteo Jose. At tuwing matatapos ang schoolyear - makakakita na lang kame ng mga school supplies - recycled nga lang. Pinagtyatyagaan ni papa kunin yung mga ballpen (yung sumusulat pa naman syempre), staplers, bond papers, binders, folders, at kung anu-ano pa na pede namin magamit sa school. Meron pa ngang uwing mga libro. Yung Ibong Adarna, 3 yata yung nakuha nya. Mga drawing papers, gamit na gamit namin.Pati Noli Me tangere at El Fili meron din. Mga science books sa MITHS ang ginagawa kong refenrence book.
I was in my 2nd yr HS nung nag assign ang English prof asked us to read Beowulf as our homework. kaso yung nasa textbook, kulang, hinde tapos. Good thing my mom's old textbooks (take note, my English teacher used to be my mom's professor also when she was in High School) was still around. And yun, kumpleto. The next day - ako lang (bukod sa teacher namin) ang nakakaalam ng beowulf. Same as with Florante at Laura. napakalalalim ng mga Tagalog words! Ang patawa dun, yung teacher namin e sobrang sungit. pero ganado ako mag aral pag me exam, kase me extra reference ako, hehehehe! Isa yata ako sa nabigyan ng 91 na average sa Filipino nun, knowing na section B pa ako nun!
Yung Noli Me Tangere, before mag umpisa yung schoolyear, nakaka-15 chapters nako ng nababasa. Hanngang sa pagkatpos pa lang ng Noli, tpos ko na ang El Fili!
Lahat ng yan, dahil sa hilig ko sa pagbabasa. At malamang sa magka-part 2 to dahil sa hinaba-haba ng naisulat ko, hanggang high school lang to.
Korek? Korek ka Jen!
3 Years old din daw I can write my name na.4 years old and I can read.And naaalala ko, i was 4 when Papa was in Saudi, and gumagawa ako ng love letters sa kanya non! O diba! Mama always ask me to write a portion sa mga letter na pinapadala nya kay Papa. I would remember na sa yellow paper pa kame sumusulat nun.
My mom was a fulltime housewife. Ang trabaho lang nya nun e ang mag-alaga ng 3 makukulet na bata -kame yun. 3 pa lng kame nung mga panahong yun. Di masasabing mayaman sina Mama during her child years. Pero can afford sila. Yung whitewesting house na ref na ammahal nung mga panahonh yon e meron sila. Paano kase, sa UP nagwo-work si Lolo at malakas ang tindahan ni Lola. Sari-sari store lang pero yun lang yata ung tindahan sa lugar namin. Plus makikita mo naman sa mga damit nila. pati na yung mga pictures sa studio. Grabe, every year yata meron! At sa mga Flores de Mayo - palaging sila ang Hermana Mayor!
So when I was 5 or 6, and being the eldest, katulong ako ni Mama maglinis ng bahay. As in tinataob namin ung bahay. Hanggang sa kasuluksulukang agiw e aalis, at kahit yung pinakamabigat na cabinet e ililipat para mapunasan ung ilalim. At merong part ng bahay na puro books, na sa sobrang kalumaan na e iniipis na, at kulay brown na yung mga pages. Yun yung mga unang books na nabasa ko. Encyclopedias - na kinukulayan pa namin nun (malay ba naman namin na mahal yon e luma na!), reader's digest ni Papa, meron pang mga magasins for Arnis, chessbook, literature books at napakadami pang iba. Noon, naalala ko na yung ung last part ng bahay na nililinis. At pag yun na, wla na, inaabot na ako ng mahigit 3 oras dun, kase lahat ng libro na mapagdiskitahan ko e binabasa ko. Kaya kameng 3, mahilig magbasa. Ako hanggang ngayon e enjoy pa din magbasa. Ewan ko lang yung 2.
Hinde ko na matandaan ano ung unang book na natapos ko basahin.basta ang alam ko, madami akong nabasa. At dun ko na-feel na masarap pala magbasa.Ang dami ko nalalaman.At ganun ang ginagawa ko every month na nag-general cleaning kame ng bahay. Yun din ang past time ko nung rumaraket si Mama sa palengke. Nagtitinda sya ng pansit bihon. Sarap magluto nun e. Agt nung mga times na nasa palengke si Mama, naiiwan kameng 3 sa bahay. And since wala kame kasama, at natatakot tong si Mama na baka kung san kame makaabot kakagala , she would lock the door. Yung bintana open, pero yung door naka-padlock. Para kameng preso, hahahah! Yung bintana pa namin nun e ung sinaunang binata, na pedeng-pedeng tumalon. And for that, nilagyan ni mama yun ng kawayan na ipinako na parang grills para hinde kame makaalis. So pag ganun, nagbabasa ako ng books.Wala kase kameng TV nun e. Nasira na yung TV na napanalunan ni Mama at Papa sa raffle nung kakakasal lang nila (which reminds me, kame din ni Cotaco ganun ah! heheheh!)
Pero d kalaunan, dahil mautak tong kapatid kong si Sherdon, pinukpok na yung isang kawayan. natanggal naman sa pagkakapako pero ung pako nakadikit pa den sa kawayan lng. So para kameng mga presong nakalaya nun! Hahahah, laro d2, takbo dun. At alam namin pag pabalik na si Mama. Normally 1 oras sya sa palengke pag mamimili lang. So kame, lalabas ng kulungan 10 mins after umalis ni Mama (baka kase bumalik at me naiwan e), at babalik kame sa loob 10 mins bago sya dumating. At never nya kame nabuking! hahahahah!
Dun sa munting library namin ako unang nakabasa ng slumbook. I was around 8. Grade 3. kalaki-laking notebook pa nun yung ginamit nila. Hinde katulad ng mga slumbook ngayon na ang gaganda at ambabango. Yung nakita ko, mala-scrapbook ung dating.Pero halatang pinaganda lang ng ballpen at kung anu-anong art. Ung mga crush, love, motto,at kung anu-ano pa, na nung mga panahong yon e wala akong kamuwang-muwang, dun ko nalaman. At umiral ang pagiging chismosa ng lola. Noon, itinatago ni Mama yung mga sulat na galing kay papa sa kabinet lang. Hinde nga yta naka-lock yun nun. So hayun,nabasa ko mga kaek-ekan nila.Hahahahah!Dun ko nalaman na me time na halos 4 months na di nakakapagpadala ng pera si Papa sa min.Delayed din daw kase ung pasweldo ng employer. Nag iisip ako tuloy na magaling dumiskarte tong Nanay ko. 3 na kameng nag aaral nun, puro raket lang sya kaya nagkakaroon ng datung. Me nabasa pa ako ng halos 2 months bago nakasagot sa sulat si Papa.
Mahilig si Mama sa mga artista. Peborit nya si Manilyn Reynes. Kaya naman, sangkaterbang magazine (di ko na matandaan yung name, basta yung k Cristy Fermin yun) ang nakita ko kung san lahat e me article about Manilyn. O dibah? Kaya parang ako e naging peborit ko din si Mane. Nung nauso ang pocketbook, syempre, adik din ako nun. Nung una, puro tagalog lang binabasa ko. Minsan kinakaya ko na sa isang araw e sampu yta nababasa ko, yung mga tig 150+pages per book. Kaso nanawa ako, pare-pareho storya. YUng tipong magkainisan dati, maiinlab. O kaya magjowang me 3rd party. Wla nang thrill basahin.
So bumalik ako sa aming munting library. Me nakita akong isang English pocketbook, ang kapal nun, mga 500 plus pages. At natapos ko sya ng 2 araw lang, over the weekend (Note: me gawaing bahay pang kasama yan). It's a story of a girl named Jonie - who was a very lively, cheerful, pretty eventually became paralyzed, until she learned how to use her mouth the write and paint. So the story is on how she gave up and hate the world for what happend to her, but with the help of few people who strengtens her faith e natanggap nya eventually and she even tried to live happily kahit ganun yung nangyari sa kanya.
minsan nasermunan ako ni Papa (matindi magsermon yun, daig pa pari sabi ni Mama. 3 oras ng walang hinto). Bumalik na sya galing Saudi. nabanggit nya sakin na magbasa daw ako ng Bible para hindi daw matigas ulo ko. So since mabuting bata naman ako sa pagkakaalam ko, i did. As in inumpisahan ko sa Genesis.Although hindi ko naman nabasa lahat. Me part dun, Psalms yata, na hindi ko mainindihan kaya lipat ako sa New testament. kaso, yung books of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, pare-pareho. Sabi ko, ay bakit ganun? So lipat naman ako sa Revealations. So I would say na madami naman akong nabasa sa Bible. Hindi nga lang lahat - at hindi ko kabisado.
Grade 6 ako nung madyo naging pabibo ako. Feeling ko nga kase e matalino ako. Although honor student naman ako ng Grade 1. Grade 2 pang-7 ako sa top 10 kaso 5 lang binigyan ng medal. grade 3 - kasama sa top 10 sa Religion. Grade 4 at Grade 5, palaging kulang ng point para makasama sa honor roll. Palaging 5 kinukuha nun at either pang 6 or pang 7 ako. Grade 6 nung nagkaroon nga mga pambato para sa quiz bee..As usual, salimpusa na naman ako..umaatend ako ng mga coaching nila after classes..enjoy naman. Kase natututunan mo na yung mga lectures before pa i-discuss sa klase. Pero one-week before the quiz bee, nilipat ako sa essay writing. Maryosep, kelangan pala dun e magandang magsulat (as in hand writing), dedma na ung content.. Anyway, after nun, nagkaroon pa ng isa pang contest - QUIZ BEE..1 buwan yata before nun e palagi kameng me spelling exam to identify sino magiging representative ng school. Sa kagustuhan kong magkaroon man lng ng medal ng Graduation - binabasa ko ung webster's dictionary! take note - hinde pocket dictionary ha, yung makapal! Ending - hinde nagkaroon ng representative school namin, dunno why.
Pero sa awa naman ng Diyos, dininig nya dasal ko - Achiever's list ako nung graduation namin nung grade 6. Me medal ako, kaso hinde na pala umaakyat mga parents nun. hanggang sa nag High school na ako.3 taon nabakante si papa after nya mangaling ng Saudi. And after 3 years, saka pa lang sya nagkaroon ng work. Ipinasok sya ni Ninang na electrician sa Mapua High sa Doroteo Jose. At tuwing matatapos ang schoolyear - makakakita na lang kame ng mga school supplies - recycled nga lang. Pinagtyatyagaan ni papa kunin yung mga ballpen (yung sumusulat pa naman syempre), staplers, bond papers, binders, folders, at kung anu-ano pa na pede namin magamit sa school. Meron pa ngang uwing mga libro. Yung Ibong Adarna, 3 yata yung nakuha nya. Mga drawing papers, gamit na gamit namin.Pati Noli Me tangere at El Fili meron din. Mga science books sa MITHS ang ginagawa kong refenrence book.
I was in my 2nd yr HS nung nag assign ang English prof asked us to read Beowulf as our homework. kaso yung nasa textbook, kulang, hinde tapos. Good thing my mom's old textbooks (take note, my English teacher used to be my mom's professor also when she was in High School) was still around. And yun, kumpleto. The next day - ako lang (bukod sa teacher namin) ang nakakaalam ng beowulf. Same as with Florante at Laura. napakalalalim ng mga Tagalog words! Ang patawa dun, yung teacher namin e sobrang sungit. pero ganado ako mag aral pag me exam, kase me extra reference ako, hehehehe! Isa yata ako sa nabigyan ng 91 na average sa Filipino nun, knowing na section B pa ako nun!
Yung Noli Me Tangere, before mag umpisa yung schoolyear, nakaka-15 chapters nako ng nababasa. Hanngang sa pagkatpos pa lang ng Noli, tpos ko na ang El Fili!
Lahat ng yan, dahil sa hilig ko sa pagbabasa. At malamang sa magka-part 2 to dahil sa hinaba-haba ng naisulat ko, hanggang high school lang to.
Korek? Korek ka Jen!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
The 90/10 Principle
I was revisiting my old blogs. Antagal ko din palang hinde nagpost dun. at sa pagbabasa-basa e nakita ko ulet to. Sobrang totoo.
Minsan nung me orientation kame sa office about customer service, isa din to sa mga diniscussed. At kahit saan, applicable tong principle na to..
Basahin sa baba....
Author : Stephen Covey
Have you read this before? Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations). What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.
How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light., but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.
Let's use an example. You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You haveno control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus.
Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's ok honey, you just need,to be more careful next time". Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves.You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.
Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive? Remember the 90/10 principle, nd do not worry about it.
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will losenothing if you try it.
The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seem to be a success in life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time. Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged
You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle. It will change your life.
Minsan nung me orientation kame sa office about customer service, isa din to sa mga diniscussed. At kahit saan, applicable tong principle na to..
Basahin sa baba....
Author : Stephen Covey
Have you read this before? Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations). What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.
How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light., but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.
Let's use an example. You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You haveno control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus.
Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's ok honey, you just need,to be more careful next time". Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves.You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.
Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive? Remember the 90/10 principle, nd do not worry about it.
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will losenothing if you try it.
The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seem to be a success in life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time. Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged
You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle. It will change your life.
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